New Year, New Start (Leaving a Domestically Abusive Relationship)

For many, the New Year often signals a new start. Sometimes people decide it is time to leave a relationship that doesn’t feel right and start afresh. This can be a particularly difficult and stressful situation to navigate, especially if the relationship has been abusive or violent, and it takes an enormous amount of courage to say that enough is enough. Deciding to end the relationship is hard, but Hopkins Solicitors are here to help and support you every step of the way.

Where to start after deciding to end the relationship? Firstly, it is essential to ensure that you and your children are safe. We can arrange an initial meeting to discuss the protective measures that may be appropriate for you and your children. Here are some of the most common questions that we are asked.

What can I do to stay in the property when my ex-partner has been domestically abusive?

In certain circumstances, an Occupation Order can be obtained through the Family Court. This is a type of injunction which usually lasts for 3 months, 6 months, a year or sometimes longer in specific situations. It can make a domestically abusive ex-partner leave the property. If they have already left, it can prohibit them from the property for a defined period of time.

There are various factors that the court considers when making an order of this kind, so you must seek advice that best fits your circumstances.

My ex-partner will not accept that the relationship is over and won’t leave me alone – what can I do?

When you meet with us, we can discuss whether you have sufficient grounds to apply for a Non-Molestation Order. This is a type of injunction that can be obtained through the Family Court when there has been “molestation”. Such orders typically last for 3 months, 6 months, one year or sometimes longer in certain circumstances.

A Non-Molestation Order can prevent a range of behaviours, including violence, harassment, or persistent unwanted contact. It can also prohibit the individual from coming within a specified distance of the property where you are living.

If you do not meet the criteria for a Non-Molestation Order, we can instead discuss sending a warning letter. This is a formal letter sent to your ex-partner warning them that, should their behaviour continue, an application for a Non-Molestation Order will be made. This approach is generally used where there has been harassment but no recent threats of harm or physical violence.

By meeting with us, we can provide clear, expert guidance and supportive advice to help you fully understand your options and the processes involved.

Should my ex-partner be able to see the children?

Firstly, it is important that you are guided by professional advice from a Social Worker or Social Services. If they consider it to be safe, or they are not involved, then the courts will generally expect parents to agree arrangements between themselves (so long as it is safe to do so).

Where there is no court order in place, responsibility for agreeing arrangements rests with the parents. We can support you by providing advice on appropriate arrangements, tailored to your individual circumstances.

What if my abusive ex-partner keeps my children?

If this occurs, we can explore making an urgent application to the court for the children to be returned. We would seek a Child Arrangements Order requesting that the children live with you, alongside a Specific Issue Order requiring their return to your care.

In addition to this, we would ask the court to make a Prohibited Steps Order, preventing your ex-partner from retaining the children again. Please note that, in some circumstances, the court may not grant the Prohibited Steps Order if it considers that a “Live With” order would achieve the same thing.

Our expert Family team at Hopkins Solicitors have the skill and experience to support you throughout the process, from start to finish.

Can I have an order for the children to live with me?

This will depend on your individual circumstances. Where there is a disagreement regarding child arrangements, it is common for the person who spends time with the children (rather than the parent with whom the children live with) to make an application to the court.

However, there are some circumstances in which the parent with whom the children live can apply. The court will usually apply the no order principle, meaning you must satisfy the court that it is better to make an order than to have no order at all. If this is a process you are considering, it is essential to obtain advice that is tailored to your specific circumstances.

How can we help?

Our expert team of legal specialists is here to support you. Contact your local office to receive advice tailored to your individual circumstances. We offer free consultations to assess eligibility for legal aid. If you are not eligible for legal aid for court proceedings, we also provide an initial fixed-fee appointment package.